Knowing this will make you a GENIUS healer!

June 27, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Emotional Healing Training, Forgiveness

I was on a road trip and happened to be reading Barbara Brennan’s book Light Emerging.  I was reading her chapter on the seven stages of healing.  I had an incredible “aha moment” as I realized this information explained why I could have two different patients with the same symptoms and totally different outcomes.

I may have two patients with right leg pain (sciatica).  One patient responds to my brilliant care in one treatment having no more pain.  I feel like a genius doctor who can fix this problem in anyone but the next patient with this same problem comes in and I can’t get any change or healing to occur.  After learning the seven stages of healing I understood why.

Seven Stages of Healing

  1. Denial:  “There’s nothing wrong with me.”  “It’s normal to have headaches.”  “Everyone has problems like this.”
  2. Anger:  “Why me?”  “This isn’t fair.”  “I don’t deserve this problem.”  “I hate this pain.” “Someone else is to blame.”
  3. Bargain:  “Okay, I’ve been bad and now I need to change so this will stop or go away.”  “I will do what the doctor say as long as I’m guaranteed to get rid of this.”  “I’ll get surgery if it will make it better.”  “I’ll take 100 vitamins and do colonics every day if it will make it better.” “I hate my life so I have to fix it.”
  4. Depression:  “It doesn’t matter what I do, nothing gets better.”  “I’m stuck with this problem.” “It will never go away.”
  5. Acceptance:  “I feel better.”  “Things are getting better.”  “I still have a way to go but I feel hope.” “I love my life so I know it will change.”
  6. Light Emerging:  “Things in my life are changing rapidly.”  “Some days I think nothing has changed but then I see a lot of things have changed.”  “New people are coming into my life.”  “Things in my life are changing rapidly.”  “I feel the meaning of let go, let God.”
  7. Creation of New Life:  “I am solidly placed in a completely new scenario in my life.”  “There are new people and things.” “I am excited at the prospect of learning new ways of being and living my life in this new place.”

So here’s the genius part:  The patient who healed was in “Light Emerging”.  The patient I couldn’t help heal was in “Depression”.  Use muscle testing to determine what stage of healing your client is in with a particular problem.  The ones in “Acceptance”, “Light Emerging” and “Creation of New Life” will get better with very little effort on your part.

For the others, in “Denial”, “Anger”, “Bargain” or “Depression”; use EPTworks™ to quickly reveal and release what it holding them back.  Voila!  You too, can be a genius healer!

Think about a problem you would like to heal and determine what stage of healing you are in with that problem. Your decision to heal will  take you on a road trip to “Creation of New Life”.  Enjoy the journey!

Much gratitude to Barbara Brennan for her great contribution to this work!

I would love to hear how you have used the stages of healing to increase the focus and speed of healing in your life or in helping others.  Please leave a comment below.

EPTworks™ is More by Sherry Hamilton

May 16, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Emotional Healing Training, Forgiveness

Photo by Jenn Ocken Photography

More that just making a bad feeling go away.

That point in time when you can’t locate that pain you’ve carried and depended on for a point of reference is what I sought after.  For my own pain and now for others who I’ve helped walk through the EPTworks process for 20 years.  There is that definite point in the process when the pain ceases, and there is a relief.

But what comes after the bad feeling or pain is gone? 

               A new identity.

One woman I worked on who had carried a constant headache for over 25 years, said, “I’ll go home a new wife to my husband tonight.” She left in sort of a daze.  I was also amazed and intrigued that she never came to me again after that life-altering experience.  She paid her bill and left.  Emotions and the expression of love is the focus of EPTworks, not just the ceasing of pain.  Lives change when pain ceases.  When your pain has consumed so much attention, but now it’s not there is an odd place for many.

How you change your life in loving others is a completely new place when the pain ceases.  Some just go away because they used their pain to serve an internal need to isolate from intimacy in relationships.  Recognizing the resistance in myself to grow from

helplessness to helper;

self-justification to forgiveness;

limits on pleasure and gratitude to thankfulness in all things

is the greater shift away from pain.  This is more than letting go, but beginning something new and growing into a new experience that glorifies our Creator.  It feels great!  Seeing the process and going toward the points of resistance is important in EPTworks.  It becomes an amazing journey of self-awareness and courage to see that what I thought held me in it’s power no longer does.  Some statements for moving toward resistance to healing pain:

  • I forgive myself for believing I can’t live without this pain.
  • I forgive myself for using this pain as a block to my intimacy with others.
  • I forgive myself for depending on pain to express what I am unable or unwilling to express verbally.
  • I forgive myself for taking on pain as my expression of what I cannot make right for myself or for someone else.
  • I give others permission to forgive me for using my pain to keep me from intimacy with them.
  • I give myself permission to open up to a new feeling of compassion and intimacy with myself and to allow for the beginning of greater love and intimacy in my life and in my relationships.

Guest blogger: Sherry Hamilton

 

 

Transforming Worry, Anxiety and Stress into Peace and Calm

May 5, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Emotional Healing Training, Forgiveness

The Serenity Prayer:

Martin Rossman, M.D. Author of “The Worry Solution”, explains how to assess and direct your mental thoughts about worry so as to reduce unnecessary anxiety and stress.  He explains that imagination is a powerful, creative force.  Worry is that imaginative force gone awry or without properly guided direction.  Worry usually looks to the past or future to fuel it.  It can take over and direct our feelings cascading the body with chemical directives into fear, anxiety, and immobility.  When we understand how the brain learns and processes, then we can use that information to harness our own imaginative self and direct the feelings and the chemical responses that reduce anxiety and stress rather than encourage it.  This takes education of how the system works, practice of directed thinking and acknowledging new experiences of peace and calmness. 

Part of Dr. Rossman’s process is to separate “good” productive worry from “bad” futile worry.  He uses the “Serenity Prayer” in his speech, “How Your Brain Can Turn Anxiety into Calmness” as a guide to show a simple way to do this.  You make three buckets for your worry: 

  • Bucket 1:  “Things I Can Change” 
  • Bucket 2:  “Things I Cannot Change” 
  • Bucket 3:  “Things I’m Not Sure About My Power To Change Or Effect” 

To access the serenity or peace, you have to also access courage and wisdom.  These things do not come when fear and anxiousness are in the mind.  Taking some rest time and using the imagination can clear your thinking.  Your imagination used with laser, focused direction can change the chemicals that are producing anxiousness into chemicals that are producing peaceful, calm feelings. 

Dr. Rossman gives the example that if you have a friend who is sick with cancer and you are worried about her possible death, you don’t know the outcome and there doesn’t seem to be any way for you to help.  So, your worry goes around and around.  He suggests that you might not help her, but you can help yourself reduce your anxious, futile worrying by using your imagination.  Think about what you want to happen with your friend and focus on your desired outcome.  Having a focus on a desired outcome will reduce anxiety in the mind.  The mind-body tends to go where you focus.  This is a disciplined approach to thinking especially if you have lived with or worked with a “worry wart.”  You know who they are, and you don’t want to be one!  If you are one, then have the courage to change your brain! 

EPTworks is an indispensable system used by trained practitioners to quickly clear the mind of unconscious or conscious clutter getting in the way of focused thinking.  It works on multiple levels of the emotional body at the same time, creating an efficient, effective, and multidimensional approach that causes chemical changes and emotional shifts.  That’s why people feel the good effects of EPTworks often in the very first session!  The book of James 1:5 in the New Testament states:  If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.” Also in James 5: 16  “The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.”

 

 Guest blogger Sherry Hamilton

Speech link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KYJdekjiAog&feature=youtube_gdata_player

The Worry Solution link:  http://worrysolution.com/

Serenity Prayer link:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer

A Flying Frozen Turkey and Forgiveness

May 3, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Emotional Healing Training, Forgiveness

A true-life example of the power of forgiveness made national news in 2005.

Columnist Jay Evensen tells the story:

How would you feel toward a teenager who decided to toss a 20-pound frozen turkey from a speeding car headlong into the windshield of the car you were driving?

How would you feel after enduring six hours of surgery using metal plates and other hardware to piece your face together, and after learning you still face years of therapy before returning to normal–and that you ought to feel lucky you didn’t die or suffer permanent brain damage?

And how would you feel after learning that your assailant and his buddies had the turkey in the first place because they had stolen a credit card and gone on a senseless shopping spree, just for kicks?

This is the kind of hideous crime that propels politicians to office on promises of getting tough on crime. It’s the kind of thing that prompts legislators to climb all over each other in a struggle to be the first to introduce a bill that would add enhanced penalties for the use of frozen fowl in the commission of a crime.

The New York Times quoted the district attorney as saying this is the sort of crime for which victims feel no punishment is harsh enough.  ‘Death doesn’t even satisfy them,’ he said.

Which is what makes what really happened so unusual.  The victim, Victoria Ruvolo, a 44-year-old former manager of a collections agency, was more interested in salvaging the life of her 19-year-old assailant, Ryan Cushing, than in exacting any sort of revenge.  She pestered prosecutors for information about him, his life, how he was raised, etc.  Then she insisted on offering him a plea deal.  Cushing could serve six months in the county jail and be on probation for 5 years if he pleaded guilty to second-degree assault.

Had he been convicted of first-degree assault–the charge most fitting for the crime–he could have served 25 years in prison, finally thrown back into society as a middle-aged man with no skills or prospects.

But this is only half the story.  The rest of it, what happened the day this all played out in court, is the truly remarkable part.

According to an account in the New York Post, Cushing carefully and tentatively made his way to where Ruvolo sat in the courtroom and tearfully whispered an apology. ‘I’m so sorry for what I did to you.’

Rubolo then stood, and the victim and her assailant embraced, weeping.  She stroked his head and patted his back as he sobbed, and witnesses, including a Times reporter heard her say, ‘It’s OK. I just want you to make your life the best it can be.’  According to accounts, hardened prosecutors, and even reporters, were choking back tears.  (Taken from: Jay Evensen, “Forgiveness Has Power to Change Future,” Deseret Morning News, August 21, 2005, p. AA3)

You can read Victoria Ruvolo’s story in her book: No Room for Vengeance: In Justice and Healing

I Don’t Want To Go There

April 22, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Emotional Healing Training, Forgiveness

Whatever bad may have happened to you in your life; you can bet you don’t want to go there ever again.

i don't want to go thereHave you ever been asked about a very touchy or hard family situation?  Maybe you came from a family that constantly yelled at each other.  Maybe you have gone through some horrible romantic break-up. Maybe your best friend betrayed you when you were in Junior High.

The truth is you never left “there”.  You are still living “there”.  You are attempting to manage the pain of an old memory by avoiding the memory.

EPTworks is an amazing tool that allows you to:

  1. Let go of the pain of old memories
  2. Relocate yourself into a life you create and love right here, right now.

The next time you have the thought, “I don’t want to go there,” realize you already are “there” and  now it’s time to forgive and let go so you can relocate your life where you want to be.

EPTworks Lifeworks Retreat is an amazing three days that allows you to “go there” and transform your life forever!

Decide NOW EPTworks™ Lifeworks Holistic Healing Escape is what you need in your life!  

LifeworksRegisterButton

 This is not where you thought you were going.  It’s so much better!

How To Heal After Divorce

April 18, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Emotional Healing Training, Forgiveness

 

how to heal after divorce“I hate him and I’m over it!  Unfortunately, I still have to deal with this man because we share children.”

For many, divorce doesn’t make a difficult relationship any easier.

Putting your marriage relationship to death, doesn’t fix the pain, failure and frustration.

Long after the divorce papers are signed, you may carry the emotional scars of being deeply hurt and disappointed by the one you loved, trusted and made babies with.  Like death, with divorce there is a real sense of loss; an emptiness, failure and broken heart.

Three Steps to Heal After Divorce:

1) Let Go

Be willing to let go of what was: all the pain, blame, hurt, guilt, shame, failure and negative    emotions of hatred, anger and frustration. Be willing to let go of what you hoped for: a future of love with this man and your children.

2) Forgive

    Forgive yourself for your vow “till death do us part”
    Forgive him for his vow “till death do us part”
    Ask God to forgive you for your vow “till death do us part”
    Forgive yourself for believing divorce is an unforgivable sin.
    Forgive yourself for everything you may have done to cause this failure.
    Forgive yourself for not being able to hold the family together.
    Forgive yourself for believing your children will never get over the loss of their family.
    Forgive yourself for believing you have to hate him or suffer to justify the divorce.
    Forgive yourself for holding on to a family that doesn’t exist.
    (the family that healed and stayed together)
    Give your ex permission to forgive you for being unable to continue in this marriage.
    Give your ex permission to forgive you for being unable to meet his expectations.

3) Open Your Heart

Without all this hurt and failure, what is now possible for your life? Without this pain and failure, I am free to:

  •       love myself and my children more.
  •       attract more love into my life.
  •       be happier and more confident than I have ever been.
  •       trust love again.

EPTworks is an amazing tool that uses the power of love and forgiveness to allow you to heal after divorce faster than you ever thought possible.  If you are still carrying the pain of a failed marriage in your life; EPTworks can transform that hurt into positive energy that you can use to create more  love in your life right now.

Our EPTworks Guarantee:  If after one session of EPTworks, you do not think we can help you, there is no charge.

Book a private EPTworks session with a certified EPTworks practitioner today.

I Can’t Forgive

April 5, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Emotional Healing Training, Forgiveness

There are things that can happen that are really hard in life.  I’m talking about the over-the-top-traumas that are devastating to the individual and to humanity itself.  Things like witnessing a murder at age four and then being raped at the burial site or having a family member brutally murdered for no reason.  To talk about forgiveness in these traumas can seem heartless, and uncaring.  The pain is so excruciating, and the thought of forgiving the offender seems impossible.  You must remind yourself that forgiveness is not just about “freeing the offender”.  Forgiveness is about “freeing the one who was offended”.

Richard Mollica is an expert in helping people devastated by war crimes to heal and move on with their lives.  In his book, Healing Invisible Wounds, he explains the process of healing for these unspeakable traumas.

First and foremost, the victim must be able to tell their story to a compassionate listener.  By telling her story, the victim is allowing the listener to realize what terrible, wrongful event has occurred so that there is an awareness in community that this can happen and that it should be prevented in the future.  By compassionately listening, the listener represents the community to say, “I’m sorry this happened to you.  It should not have happened. It was wrong.  I won’t let this happen again.”

Finally, the victim must be given total absolution; as the listener helps the victim to forgive.

“I forgive myself for believing it was my fault.”
“I forgive myself for believing there was something I did that caused this trauma.”
“I forgive myself for believing there was something I could have done to stop this trauma.”
“I forgive myself for holding on to a trauma that doesn’t exist anymore.”
“I forgive myself for believing this trauma has ruined my life and future.”
“I forgive myself for giving up my power to love and forgive because of this trauma.”

EPTworks is an amazing tool that frees you to forgive the hurt that has robbed you of the power to love life.

 

 

Raising the dead.

March 27, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Emotional Healing Training, Forgiveness

Jenn Ocken Photography

Now I read my Bible and I’m a good little christian girl. I believe that miracles happen but I stop short on raising the dead and maybe you do too.  I know I see in scripture how Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead even after he had been in the tomb for a few days. Jesus also raised a little girl back to life who was dead.  In the Old Testament, I read how a widow came to Elijah and asked him to heal her son and Elijah came to her dead son and brought him back to life.  I can clearly see that God can raise the dead back to life.

Ask yourself, what in your life has died.  It may be a relationship, a dream, a hope or maybe the child in you who believed in love.  God has the power to raise the dead back to life. Give yourself permission to pick up the dead that exists in your life right now.  Close your eyes and carry the dead, the things in your life you have given up on or lost total hope for, to an altar. Lay the dead on the altar in your mind and ask Jesus to bring it back to life. Pray, I can’t do it, God. Please do it for me. Bring this part of my life back to rise in new life.  See it happen. Invite this new life back into your heart. Thank God for the miracle of raising the dead.

Three Reasons to Forgive

March 18, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Forgiveness

EPT Works – Business Works #1 and LifeWorks © Jenn Ocken Photography

1) Forgiveness allows you to do the impossible.

When you forgive, you enter a state of divine giving.  You give the impossible to another person or yourself.  You grant absolution and freedom to one who does not deserve it.  Through giving forgiveness, both the offender and the offended are set free. The hurt of the offended and the guilt of the offender are released opening space for divine healing.

2) Forgiveness causes miracles to happen.

Forgiveness is an act of releasing blame, shame, old hurt, trauma, and pain.  When you forgive, you literally release all the “junk”; the balled up mass of hurt, resentment, anger, revenge, justification and trauma.  That “junk” takes up a lot of space in your being. When you release it through forgiveness, you open up massive space for God to move in and bless you in ways you can not even imagine.  Pain disappears, hard relationships heal, love magnifies in your life and you witness more and more of the miraculous; God’s work in your life.

3) Forgiveness makes the world a better place for you, your children and all people.

Forgiveness is a conscious act of love that aligns you with God’s love, mercy and forgiveness.  Forgiveness reconciles us with each other and with God.

The Place Where Bad Habit Goes FOREVER and Good Habit Stays FOREVER by Sherry Hamilton

March 15, 2013 in Blog, Emotional Healing, Emotional Healing Training, Forgiveness, Health, Nutrition

 

by Jenn Ocken Photography

This week I had the pleasure, yes pleasure, to sit through a six hour lecture presented by Bill M. Kelley, Ph.D., from Dartmouth College.  I’ll spare you his titles, but the lecture was about the brain and habits.  How habits are formed, and why changing bad habits into good habits is hard for most people and near impossible for some people.  It really does require more than willpower, and knowing what is happening inside your gray matter can help ease the process.

Dr. Kelley showed that the brain is really good at short-cutting information to speed up your process to get something done.  We were given the simple task to see a word and tell what color the word was printed in.  The first word was “red” and it was printed in red.  Oh, so easy!  All 300 of us proclaimed “red.”  Then we had the word “blue” in blue.  We see the word and tell the color: “blue.”  Then with green we are forming a habit of seeing the word and telling its color.  After a couple of reds, blues and greens Dr. Kelley flashes a slide that is the word “green” printed in the color blue.  One third of the room proclaimed “green” the other two thirds were choking back the word and searching for the correct answer of “blue.”  That pause and need to stop and think about what I’m seeing and what information I’m supposed to be giving was a quick way to show that there is hesitation when something changes and upsets your habit.  The shortcut your brain set up for you didn’t work on every solution, and you paused to figure out your conflict and eventually come up with the solution.    When you want to change that habit, there is a pause. 

This pause is where you consciously have to stop and choose your action for the new outcome you are wanting. 

  1. Your Mind-Body is Smart and Efficient

Your mind-body sets up a habit and speeds up the processing like driving a race car on a super highway.  The more you do the same action, the more efficient you get at doing it.  You think you are driving that race car, but there is a chemical called dopamine who you gave the car keys to.  Dopamine is driving you to “do it again” and you are just along for the ride.  Sometimes you are blindfolded and gagged to represent your feeling of helplessness when you make choices and give into your bad or self-destructive habits.

  1. Your Mind-Body is Super-Duper Efficient

Not only does your mind-body set up your habits on familiar super highways, but your mind-body also keeps track of all the details leading up to your action, and sets them up as habits on super highways in your mind-body too!

  1. Key to Changing Out a Bad Habit for a Good Habit Requires Conscious Effort– Pause, Expend New Effort

Establishing a life-long good habit requires getting your body to agree it is a habit and to build for you a super highway bigger and better than the super highway you have up in your gray matter for your bad habit.  Really that’s all there is to it!  Being aware of what you are doing here is one of the keys to building a successful good habit super highway in your brain and body system.

  1. Make Your Choice More Attractive for Getting Your Greatest Reward:  Love

In EPTworks, making the good habit super highway bigger and better so the mind-body will choose it is based on attaching the positive emotional charge of true love to the new good habit. The Biblical truth that love is the greatest single power source we have access to is mankind’s greatest reward.  When my new good habit is rewarded with the best emotions and aspects of true love, then I will be drawn to choose that habit more often than my self-destructive habit. 

  1. EPTworks Therapy Makes the Bad Habit Super Highway Less Attractive Using:  Forgiveness

            Forgiving myself for believing what isn’t true about this bad habit makes it less attractive to me.

In letting go of a bad habit, there are usually reasons why we want to keep doing it.  EPTworks seeks out the long held beliefs that are giving value to your bad habit and making you want to “do it again”.  Using specific forgiveness for beliefs that aren’t true will neutralize the beliefs and allow the mind to resolve each conflict attached to the bad habit.  Using this therapy makes the bad habit super highway look even less attractive and easier to switch over to the new good habit super highway we are building bigger and better.

By guest blogger: Sherry Hamilton